Bakersfield Mom

Q: My husband’s previous wife passed on four years ago and left him with two boys, now ages 7 and 9. We have been married for almost two years and also have a little girl who is 6 months old. To round out our family, I recently adopted the two boys. My problem is that their grandmother, his former wife’s mother, is incredibly rude to me. Whenever I post things on Facebook about what our family is doing she comments, reminding me that I “am only the stepmom” and telling me about the things her daughter and my husband did before her death. Her other daughters often call me out and I feel like I have to defend myself. I don’t know what to do. What’s good ex-etiquette?  Continue reading →

Other soccer parents loudly criticize your son’s game. Should you go to the coach?

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Q: I recently broke off a three-year relationship — and his mother is my best friend. Who tells her and how do we do it?  Continue reading →

Your in-laws toss profanity around with abandon. Should you ask them to tone it down for the kids?

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The following post is sponsored by Dignity Health:

Take a few minutes and ask yourself the following questions.  Your family is counting on you!  Continue reading →

Bath time can elicit all sorts of feelings for a parent and they don’t all match the Johnson’s baby advertisements. Often this can be a period of stress but by understanding your child’s dominant sense, being organized ahead of time and following all the usual safety advice like checking the bath water temperature, using a built-in or attached safety holder, and never leaving the baby unattended, even for a moment; you will be able to be able to transform your bath time into a fun and bonding experience.  Continue reading →

Q: Our 7-year-old son is very negative about everything. He’s a middle child, so that may have something to do with it, but everyone else in the family is very happy, positive, optimistic, and so on. He never has anything positive to say about anything. Things the rest of us enjoy he says are “stupid” or “dumb.” We raise all of our kids the same, so we don’t understand where the negativity is coming from, or what to do about it. It’s beginning to drive us a tad batty. In fact, we are starting to not want him around us, which is causing us guilt. By the way, he’s often this way around his friends and other people. We’ve tried talking, but that’s gotten us nowhere. We hesitate to punish for fear that he can’t help it. Any ideas?  Continue reading →

Question: I’m dating a guy with teenage daughters 16 and 18. He is always hugging them, and when we sit on the couch he will rub my leg and theirs as well. We went to a talk yesterday and his youngest daughter laid her head on his shoulder — his response was to lay his head on hers. It only lasted a second, but I am confused about this. Some people think his daughters are his girlfriends. Am I over reacting? What’s good ex-etiquette?  Continue reading →

Your 13-year-old is spending her money on flashy, colorful bras. Does this mean anything?  Continue reading →

Question: We have two boys, 8 and 7. They are completely, and I mean COMPLETELY, out of control. They constantly argue, fight and tattle. If they’re not fighting, they’re playing chaotically. Homework is a constant battle, and getting them to bed takes over an hour. To top it off, they completely ignore us when we give them instructions, and one boy’s disobedience seems to make the other boy worse. It’s driving me absolutely nuts, but they don’t seem to care. We can’t go out in public or have people over to our house because their behavior is at its worst when other people are around. They love an audience. PLEASE HELP!!!  Continue reading →